It's The Most Wonderful Time of The Year

So...it's that time of year again.  Carols, trees, family, food, presents and Jesus.  We have had a wonderful Christmas season this year.  We baked cookies, read bible stories, saw lots of lights, drank hot chocolate, played in the snow, sang songs, watched movies and spent lots of time together as a family. 

We spent Christmas Eve at home all together.  This is a first for us.  We stayed in our pjs and played games most of the day.  That evening we tossed some reindeer food (glitter and oats made by a couple of his friends from school) in the yard and then Cooper got to open one present.  He got new pajamas (Captain America) an Avengers cup and Planes.  We got dressed in the new pjs, filled up the cup and headed upstairs to watch his new movie.  We miraculously got him in bed on time and then Mommy and Daddy proceeded to do elf some duties.

I was the kid on Christmas morning - up at 7am and anxious to open presents.  All Coop wanted to do was sleep.  I went in to see if he was ready to get up and was told, "I'm still sleeping."  Eventually, he woke up and we got the party started!  We began with a quick bible lesson about why we give and receive gifts at Christmas and we sang Happy Birthday to Jesus.  Then Coop opened a few presents from Mommy and Daddy and few wrapped gifts from Santa and then the big one...  A new Hot Wheels track from Santa set up and ready to go in his playroom. 

After breakfast and a few hours of playing with his new toys, Mimi, Papa, Aunt Lindsay, Uncle Buddy and cousins, Payton and Merit, came  over for Corbin Christmas.  We ate a bunch snack food, and opened LOTS of presents.  After the wrapping paper tornado was somewhat cleaned up, Cooper had one more surprise for everyone...

This guy is going to be a big brother!
He was happy to announce that he is going to be a BIG BROTHER!  The Corbin Crew couldn't have been happier.  I only wish I had been quick enough on the draw to catch their reaction with a camera of some sort. 

A few days later, we celebrated Christmas with the Langdon side of the family.  Again food, presents, wrapping paper tornado.  And again we got to share some exciting news.  My mom and opened their presents last (steaks for Dad, an Origami Owl necklace with all the grandkids' birthstones for Mom).  A few got a little suspicious when I was explaining that each little stone in the necklace represented a grandchild.  Jeremy (brother-in-law) insisted that we count them to make sure there was no subtle announcement being made.  I assured them that were only six.  We then handed out the last gifts - one envelope for each family member.  It's not uncommon for us to give a family gift to each family and after we assured them that the necklace was not an announcement, the suspicions seemed to have settled.  {hee hee hee}

Everyone opened the envelope to see this:


I was a little more prepared with the camera this time around.



So needless to say, we had a very exciting Christmas.  Each gift a reminder of the precious gift God sent us that first Christmas when he sent his one and only son to live among us.  For this gift, I am most grateful.

"The Word became flesh and made His dwelling among us."  John 1:14

Cooper funnies - thanksgiving weekend

C: cars are not cool.
M: what is cool?
C: monster trucks. And my daddy. 

Bing Crosby singing White Christmas. 
C: that's a country one! 
M: a what?
C: a CRUNCHY one!
M:??????

After a particularly stinky poop
C: I get 5 points!
After washing hands, goes to the living room. 
C: Daddy, I have points in my heart! 

Daddy got some raspberry mints. Coop loves them! Funny thing is, he calls them ornaments! Too cute!

C: may please I.....?
If he wants to do anything, he asks, "May please I...?" 
If we say no, he pouts and says, "But I said 'may please I'!"
It's a little heartbreaking, but sometime the answer is no even if you use good manners. 

Dinner time convo

Cooper has had a bit of a rough day. Accident at school, very emotional...just a struggle. After eating a surprisingly good dinner considering his attitude, Cooper went into meltdown mode when he was told he couldn't have more corn muffin. Daddy told him if he would be a happy boy, he could have a piece of Halloween candy. The tears stopped immediately. "Maybe...maybe... Good idea! Daddy can have some but Mommy can't cuz she's a girl!"  

Watch it kid. 

Cooper funnies

My son is pretty awesome. I'm sure  most parents think their kid is the coolest. Most parents are wrong. See proof below:

- while Tanner was getting Coop tucked in the other night, Cooper stopped rather abruptly. He looked deeeeeep into Tanner's eye and said, "I see Cooper in there."  He then opened his eyes very wide and asked, "Do you see Daddy?"

- We've been trying to discourage thumb-sucking. Cooper is pretty attached to his (partly in the it's-physically-attached-to-his-person kind of way and partly in a this-is-my-happy-place kind of way. We tried getting amazingly cool Batman band aids to put on it. We told him had to try to keep Batman dry and that if he tried sucking his thumb with a bandaid on, he might choke. While he was wearing his awesome Batman bandaid he came to me and said, "Mom, I'm gonna choke on this."  When I probed a little and asked why he thought that he told me, "because I want to suck my sumb!" [FAIL]

- Latest obsession = engine turtles. Rock on TMNT! 

- Tanner was trying to tell a joke in the truck the other day and I wasn't falling for it. Cooper started laughing in the backseat and said, "Daddy's just kidding!"  That's his newest go-to phrase. I have a feeling this might get him into trouble. 

- While playing play-doh before church, he lined up his toys and said, "Look Mommy! A family!" I die. 

- Cooper "helped" Daddy move a tree from the front yard to the back. He is very proud of it and has to show us every time we go outside. He even wanted to take the neighbor back to see it. 

That's all for now folks! Check back for more on my amazing kid!

Bittersweet Mommy Moments

We've all had them...those moments where our hearts are so full of love/joy/pride and yet there is part of us that feels sad/disappointed/regret.   I just had one of those moments.  I tucked Cooper into his big boy bed nearly 30 minutes ago.  I flipped on the TV and sat down to have a snack (raspberries and an orange - yeah me!) when I heard Coop singing to himself.  I stood outside his room for probably 5 minutes trying to figure out song it was (maybe B-I-N-G-O ???).  I love hearing that sweet boy sing.  Yesterday when I picked him up from school he had had an accident after his nap; he made up a song about and was singing it to his teachers.  He also spent all of naptime one day last week singing Jesus Loves Me.  Sweet, silly, rotten boy!

So there I was, outside his room, wondering how long he would keep this up before giving in and falling asleep.  And for a brief flash, I was taken back to Cooper's infancy.  I was back to waking up every 2 hours at night.  I was back to my wit's end.  I was sitting outside his door for 30 minutes at 4 in the morning crying, praying that he would learn how to go back to sleep without nursing.   I was exhausted. 

And now I'm back to the real world.  Wishing he would wake up in the night (just once in a while) so that I could help him fall asleep.  Maybe someday...

Choose to Cherish

Up super early this morning with my munchkin. Snuggling on the couch watching Wall-e, eating cereal and not minding at all that we've but up since a little after 6 on a Sunday morning. As a new mom, this would have driven me a little nuts. But now I try to cherish the early morning quiet; just me and my boy. 

This is not to say that I'm not ever tired or don't ever wish he would just go back to sleep. For today, I will choose to cherish. 

Sister?

Cooper told us he wants a sister. He said he wants to name her Stephanie. 

Thanks for the suggestion Little Man. We'll see what we can do to accommodate that request. 

Choose to Cherish

Up super early this morning with my munchkin. Snuggling on the couch watching Wall-e, eating cereal and not minding at all that we've but up since a little after 6 on a Sunday morning. As a new mom, this would have driven me a little nuts. But now I try to cherish the early morning quiet; just me and my boy. 

This is not to say that I'm not ever tired or don't ever wish he would just go back to sleep. For today, I will choose to cherish. 

That's my boy!

This quick Cooper update is brought to you by Daddy. I ran a 5K this morning at a park so Daddy took Coop to the playground while I ran. He had the place to himself for quite awhile. Then a little girl and her mommy came to play. When the little girl climbed up on the jungle gym he was playing on, Coop shouted, "Oh no! A girl! I gotta get outta here!" 

That's my boy. 

Express Ranch and Big Ol' Horses

 Northwest of our sweet little hometown is a massive cattle ranch.  They have who knows how many head of Black Angus.  Over the past 10ish years they have also gotten into raising horses. They specialize in raising Clydesdales. Let me tell you - those are some incredible animals!  This is a working ranch, but they open the barn where the horses live to the public. You can park outside and walk through and meet these giants while the ranch hands go about their day.  

I felt a little like we had stepped into The Pioneer Woman's world.  It was a slice of life. And it was delicious!  We got to play with the dogs, pet the horses and even a zebra! Cooper was a little anxious about touching the horses at first. Honestly, so was I. Their nostrils alone are as big as my fist! But they were very gentle and mild-mannered.  We had such a great time! Thanks Express Ranch!
Sweet chocolate lab pup.
First glimpse of a Clydesdale.

Lovely barn cat.

Antique horse carriage

Cooper wanted to drive

Hi Prince!

Still a little nervous.

Coolio has one blue eye and one brown eye.
He's cool like that.



My brave boy petting Coolio.


Coop really took a liking to Hitch.

I think Hitch liked him. too.

Who has a zebra on a cattle ranch?!?!


This is the look I got when I told
Cooper he couldn't soft (his word
for pet)Hitch with his feet.

Meeting Vinny.

Vinny was Cooper's favorite.
He was very friendly.

Handsome boys!

Prince is one beautiful horse.


"We're all done."

"Big ol' feet!"

He just wanted to be like the horses.

This is the barn where the horses live.
Can I live here, too?

Big Dinosaurs, Big Bed, Big Church

It's been a milestone weekend in the Corbin household. On Saturday, we went to The Sam Noble Museum of Natural History.  Cooper had a blast petting a bull snake, playing under a life size bronze statue of a mammoth and seeing amazing dinosaur bones.  He cousins (P & M) came along, too.  They had lots of fun exploring.

After we left the museum, we grabbed a quick lunch and starting heading for home. We decided to make an impromptu trip to the furniture store to look at big boy beds for a certain little man. We really have no need to take him out of crib. We've been talking about it since he is pretty well potty trained. He will need to get out of bed to go peepee on his own at some point. Really, I think we just both have the itch to redecorate.

So anyway....we go to store and look around a little. Of course the only thing we saw that we really like was going to be almost $1000.  For the bed alone. Seriously?!?! He's a toddler, not the king of the world!  Granted, the best would probably be the last one we would ever buy him, but that just seemed ridiculous. So, needless to say, we left empty handed.

After we got home, Cooper kept asking, "Where my big boy bed?"  We didn't realize that he even put two and two together. But apparently he was jazzed about the idea, so we decided to roll with it. We torn down his crib {tear} and made a mad dash to Target for non-girly sheets. We ended up with a great blanket, a fun pillow and some will-do-for-now sheets. He has slept in his big boy bed like a champ! Now if we could just convince him that it's okay to get out when he wakes up. I know most of you parents out there are hating me right now for that. But he just stays in his until we come in to get him. On second thought, maybe that isn't such a bad thing. See this post for some emotional gushing about the whole experience. By the way - I totally feel like the mom in Love You Forever because I love to sneak into his room and sit by his bed. I know - creepy.

Tanner plays in the band at church about 3 Sundays out of 4. They generally practice on Thursday nights.  We take this opportunity to go out for dinner most weeks. This week, we went to Chick-fil-A and then went to practice to watch Daddy for a few minutes. Cooper LOVED it!!!  When we got to church on Sunday, he practically begged to go watch Daddy play.  I was being Softy-Mom so I took him into "Big Church" with me.  He did incredibly well! We had to get up once to take a potty break and he got a little restless toward the end. Overall, I'm very proud of how my little man behaved. I don't think we will make this a habit just yet though. He loves playing with class and I love actually getting to hear the sermon! Haha!

So.......big weekend! Fun weekend!











Big boy bed

Cooper is sleeping in a twin bed all by himself the very first time. It's a bittersweet day. 

On a whim we decided to go to the furniture store while we were out today. Tanner and I had both been thinking about the bed thing but neither of us said anything. At the store we looked at big boy beds, but Cooper didn't seem too impressed. Then we got home and he kept asking where his bed was. We talked about it a decided to just go for it. 

We have two twin mattresses in the guest room. We decided to move the crib out and put a mattress and box springs on the floor for now. I'm sensing a DIY upholstered headboard in Coop's future. 

I just snuck into his room to check on him. I felt like I was reenacting "Love You Forever" creeping in to peek at him. I had a fleeting memory of sleepless nights spent nursing and rocking and patting him to sleep. I waited until the air conditioner would kick on to try to make my escape hopeful that low hum would cover the sound of the door. And now I want to sneak back in love on him after he's asleep. 

I just can't believe we are already here. My heart aches a little for gummy grins and baby snuggles. Not with just any ol' kid, but with my Cooper-man. It's amazing how a little thing like twin sheets can make memories flood back and make me want to stop time. But, as motherhood has taught me: for better or worse, this too shall pass. 

Movie date!

We went to see Monsters University last night. Great movie. Great time!

Cooper's Monsters University student ID. 


Check out the movie stars. 


That's one scary lineup! 

New definition of love

I've been reading a book called Grace-based Parenting. It's FANTASTIC! I was reading today about how kids need to feel genuinely loved by us, their parents. The author, Tim Kimmel, defines love this way: love is the commitment of my will to your needs and best interests, regardless of the cost. He goes on to say, "It is not in our children's best interest to give them everything they want, to make life easy for them, to side with them when they are clearly wrong, or to circumvent the consequences for their sins. It is not in their best interests to facilitate false fears holding them hostage, to fight their battles, or to rescue them from all their wrong choices." WHOA! 

Take a second.....read that again. This time, let it really sink in. I'll wait.....

My heart broke for my son! I saw a flash of his future - pain, fear, sin. Things I can't and shouldn't save him from. I know there will be times in his  future when he makes bad decisions. I will see it coming. And I will have to watch it happen. 
I pray God gives him wisdom to make good decisions. But my son isn't perfect. I have a bump on my head (from a thrown fire truck) and a bruise on my arm (from vicious little teeth) to prove it! I pray hard for God to protect my son. But this world, Satan, is out get him. 

I will love him in a way that gives him the security of knowing that when he makes mistakes, I'll be there. 

Conversations with Cooper

Me: Cooper, tell mommy if you need to make a peepee or a poopoo. 
Cooper: what bout toots?
M: you don't have to tell me, but you can if you want to. 
C: ok! I make a little toot and a big toot and another little toot! 
--------
C: Hulk is mean. 
M: Hulk is actually one of the good guys. He's a helper. 
C: oh! He help me pick up my toys! 
--------
C: Whispers (his elephant stuffed animal) doesn't have hands. 
M: no. He has feet. 
C: Hulk have hands. Whispers have feet to walk with. 
--------
Daddy: hey young man!
C: I not a young man. 
D: what are you? 
C: I a superhero! Where my cape? I fly in the clouds! 

Mother's Day 2013

In about an hour, it will officially be Mother's Day. We did our traditional celebration at Red Rock last weekend. So this weekend, I think I'll celebrate with a solo trip to Target {insert wistful sigh}.  I, in no way feel like I'm a pro at motherhood. But I do feel like I've come into my own as a mom lately. Maybe it's experience, time, or a regular sleep schedule......who can say?
Anyway, I was a little taken aback this morning when I looked at myself in the bathroom mirror.  Tanner was in the playroom with Coop while I was getting ready to run some errands. I looked up and feel like I saw myself for the first time in a really long time. Not to brag, but I'm pretty proud of my post baby body. It's by far not the best I've ever looked, but I'm pretty happy. I'm training for another 5K with survival as the goal. I'm back in pre-pre-pregnancy clothes. I'm pretty jazzed about that. But I think part of it is that I now know what my body is capable of.
It's like when I looked in that mirror this morning, the last 3 years of my life rushed past. I saw my body carrying a child, an actual human person, inside of it. I saw my body support and nurture that child at the breast for 16 months. I saw my weary body survive sleep deprivation and baby blues and come out the other side desperately in love with my son. I saw a body that survived strep throat last week and a pretty mean stomach virus this week. I saw a body that got up at 7 this morning and jogged with a 30 pound 2-year-old in the stroller. I saw a mother! Not like "soccer mom" or "martyr mom" but MOTHER! I saw a bit of tough girl, momma bear, warrior mom. And I liked it!
I want to not only be a physical fighter, but a spiritual one. It is my job, my duty, my calling to fight spiritual battles on my son's behalf. I must pray protection over his heart and mind. I must help him learn to hide God's word in his heart. I must watch my own words and action to be sure that they reflect the kind of woman I want in his life. I have no choice. Because this world is out to get him. It wants to destroy his innocence and rob him of his holiness.  This world wants to belittle him and pulverize his spirit. And if I'm not careful, I'll sit by and watch as it happens.
I refuse to sit on the sidelines. I will be in the fray, fighting for my son. I will be in God's word and on my knees doing everything humanly possible to make sure that we raise a godly man. I will not get so caught up in the momentary struggle that I lose sight of the prize. I will focus on my attention on the big things without forgetting that the little things matter. I will be a mighty mother.

I will...

Easter Egg Hunt at TCC

The Children's Center hosted their first Easter Egg Hunt for employees and their families. They had a mini petting zoo with little horses, bunnies, and chickens. Cooper loved the horses! He kept trying to move the hair out its eyes. It was really sweet.

During the egg hunt, he got a little lost in the crowd. There were lots of eggs and lots of kids, but he didn't really grasp the "hunt" concept. I found one and guarded it while trying to coax him over to get it. He was more excited about a sticker he found on the ground than he was about the egg. Oh well!







Zoo trip

If you can't tell, I got the blogger app for my phone. So now instead of sharing all the details of our life on Facebook, I can just write a quick post from my phone. I feel like my Facebook account has turned into a total bragfest. Who am I kidding? That's what it is! Anyway - here a quick pic of Coop with his elephant. Daddy bought it for him after our last trip to the zoo. We went two weekends in a row; the boy loves animals.

The whole way home from the zoo he was trying to feed he elephant goldfish and telling it, "I love you so much!"

It was precious!

Toots!

You know your husband has excessive gas when your son hears a woodpecker and says, "Daddy make toots!"

It's Ebenezer Time!

Here I raise mine Ebenezer. Hither by thy help I'm come.
And I hope by Thy good pleasure, safely to arrive at home.

I've always loved this old him. Don't believe me? Click here. A while ago, I stumbled upon Crystal's blog here via Pinterest. She talked about how God had provided for her family. She wrote about the journey God had lead them on. She also talked about raising an Ebenezer to honor what God had done. Ebenezer = stone of help, God has helped us thus far. A visible reminder of a spiritual process.

So here I am. Raising an Ebenezer. Remembering what God has done.

I've been working at the same job for nearly 4 years. It's been a job with lots of ups and downs. The people are amazing. The hours are bad. The work is good. The on-call is sometimes awful. I had been feeling like it might be time for change. Part of me was excited by that. Part of me was scared to death. After a weekend on-call during which I was paged 24 times in 24 hours, it became obvious that I didn't want to keep doing this. After I watched Tanner drag Cooper out of the office screaming "I want my mommy" so that I could continue making phone calls.....I. Was. Done.

I had a bit of a ginormous melt down on the phone with my boss and pretty much told her I was gone as soon as I could find something else. Although I'm not proud of how I acted in that moment, I needed to just break down. I needed to finally let feelings of anger, hurt, pain, loss, and sadness overwhelm me and bring me to my knees. That night as I prayed with Cooper at bedtime, I sobbed. I prayed that God would send me a way out. A rescue. I prayed that He would make His will for my career abundantly clear.

The next day, (Sunday) I applied for two jobs. Monday, I got a call to come in for an interview from one. Tuesday I got a text about interviewing for the other. Wednesday morning, I interviewed for both.  One offered me the job on the spot, but I knew almost immediately that it was not the one. By Friday, I had another job offer. I was feeling incredibly humbled. I never expected to get asked to interview for either job. I REALLY did not expect to get a job offer - let alone two!  That weekend, I called and got more details about the second offer. By Sunday evening, after lots of discussion with Tanner, I had decided to accept. Little did I know, God had other plans.

Monday at work, I told my boss that I had accepted another position and began to tell other coworkers. Tuesday I started telling people at The Children's Center that in a couple weeks I would be moving on. On of the Nurse Practioners I had spoken with asked if any of the board members knew. I don't know any of the board members so my guess was....no. Tuesday afternoon I got a bit of a cryptic phone call from another ARNP telling me to come talk to her because she had good news. For that part to make sense, you need to know a little background. This particular ARNP had approached me a few months ago about the possibility of The Children's Center hiring a clinical pharmacist. She asked if that was something I had ever considered. I honestly had not only because TCC does not have any pharmacists on staff. She told me to think about it. When I told her I was going to interview for a couple jobs, she seemed disappointed but really didn't know what kind of timeline they were on for hiring a pharmacist.

So, I went to find her and she told me that they had decided they need to hire a pharmacist.....now. She said one of the Vice Presidents at TCC wanted to speak with me. What?!?! I sat in her office and made the phone call. We discussed some responsibilities of the job and she asked if that would be something I would be interested in. I said, "ABSOLUTELY!"  She said she had to go because she was headed to a board meeting. I told her that I had already accepted another job so I was on a bit of a time crunch - no pressure.

As soon as I walked in the door Wednesday morning, I got a text from the ARNP. She said to come to her office ASAP. When I got there, the VP was sitting in her office. She said the position had been approved by the board and I asked if I could meet with HR that day. I told her I would make time. I had been leaving the pharmacy for blocks of time scheduling interviews and talking to different people for about a week already. What was one more time? Met with the HR director that afternoon. Within 2 hours she had called me with an official job offer. Seriously?!?! I was......elated/thrilled/scared/pee-my-pants-excited! This was dream-job level awesome!

By the next day, all my coworkers new that I would be leaving my current job. But I wouldn't be going far. And all I can say is - PRAISE GOD! He has made a way! It is better than anything I could have imagined. I am completely humbled by everything that has happened. I can't believe how good God is! I'm still crazy happy about the whole thing! I know it is going to be extremely challenging and I'll have days that are hard. But hopefully it will all be worth it.

Today was my last day at Pharmcare. I'm grateful for the experience I gained there. I'm glad I'm not going too far away from people I have genuinely grown to love.

Ephesians 3:20-21    Now to him who is able to do immeasurably more than all we ask or imagine, according to his power that is at work within us, to him be glory in the church and in Christ Jesus throughout all generations, for ever and ever! Amen.

He's ALL Boy!

It's becoming blatantly obvious that my son is, in fact, a boy. Within the last 4 days I've heard Cooper celebrate getting muddy. He's also told his daddy that he can "drive faster" and asked, "Where's my rocket?" He loves dinosaurs, trucks, cars, trains. He loves to growl and grunt and spit. He makes "boy noises" and laughs a crazy boy laugh.

He's also a snuggle bug who loves his mommy and daddy. After we sang our "Night-night song" tonight, I carried him to his room. He was lying in my arms as we walked through the house and I kept saying things like, "what a sweet baby." We rocked in his chair for a few minutes and said goodnight prayers. Then he said something that will forever hurt my heart. "Baby time is over." Oh. My. Goodness. Baby time is over!!!

I'm heartbroken! He still sucks his thumb and loves his silky lovies and wears diapers. But he's not a baby anymore. Whoever said that 2 is terrible obviously never met my son. He is FANTASTIC!

And he can also do a 24 piece puzzle all by himself. Just sayin'.

Cooper's 2!

Dear Cooper,
 
It's officially your birthday! Mommy is up late tonight getting everything ready for the week. Your birthday is on a Monday this year (boooo!) which means it will be a long work day. Hoping I get off at a decent time so I can love on my two-year-old.
 
The past 2 years have raced by so quickly - I often feel like I'm missing it. I'm sitting in bed right now with the laptop, watching you on your monitor (you still like sleeping on your tummy with your tush in the air) and listening to you breath and suck your thumb. My dear boy - you have no idea how much you are loved! I want to spend every second kissing your squishy cheeks and hearing you talk about your favorite colors. I want to stop time and hold on to the little moments that I don't even realize are BIG moments until they are gone. You gave me a little extra time after bedtime prayers tonight to rock and snuggle before you said, "I wah git in my bed."  Thank you for that.
 
 I feel like I'm going to turn around and you will be a pimple-faced teenager.  You will be liking girls (Lord, please NNNNOOOOO!!!!!) and wanting so badly to be grown up. I pray that you will realize that life is not about girls, or cars, or sports or school. It's about our Heavenly Father and the amazing life he gives us through His Son, Jesus. It's about sharing the love of Jesus with people and forgiving as we've been forgiven. It's about family (the one we are born into and the one we make), and it's about friends who hold us up. Choose your friends wisely Little Man!
 
At this very moment, there are Cars stickers all over the back of the couch, birthday cards on the living room floor and a tshirt on the island that says "I AM 2" just waiting for you to wake up in the morning. And I can't imagine being any happier! You are my heart! I love you BIG TIME!
 
Happy Birthday Cooper-man! Mommy loves you so much - in a completely overbearing, unhealthy, no-woman-will-ever-be-good-enough-for-you kind of way.